Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Pope Palpatine the First

So there's a new pope. Everyone I know is talking about it...but nobody's actually Catholic, so I don't see why anyone cares?

This guy is 78 years old. He won't last the weekend. And worst of all, he's determined to rid the galaxy of all the Jedi. That's right, the pope is actually Darth Sidious, as evidenced by this picture (many Bothans died to bring you this information...)

Friday, April 15, 2005

Pie-rats

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IGN » Games » Nintendo DS » News
Arrests Made in Nintendo Sting
Pirates busted for bootlegging Duck Hunt.
by Juan Castro
April 14, 2005 - Police arrested four people in connection with videogame piracy in New York and New Jersey yesterday, according to The Associated Press. Officers of the law confiscated more than 60,000 pirated products from Nintendo, including Donkey Kong, Mario Brothers, Duck Hunt, among others, according to official reports filed by federal authorities at the U.S. District Court in Manhattan. So, how did this merry band of digital thieves slip up? They tried selling the truckload of stolen goods to undercover FBI agents, that's how.

The federal agents posed as game bandits looking for a big score. Obviously, the real thieves took the bait and wound up in a world of hurt. The defendants had smuggled over 280,000 illegal video game consoles between September and December of last year, according to an official report. Commenting on the recent seizure, Nintendo reps said the company loses millions of dollars every year to software pirates, who bootleg copies of popular titles and sell them worldwide.

And there you have it. Don't bootleg Duck Hunt, folks.
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DUCK HUNT?!?

Monday, April 11, 2005

Batman and Robin

So I FINALLY saw the fourth and most awful of the Batman films, Batman and Robin, and boy, was it a stinker!

The story was so confusing and muddled. It's as if the clueless producers decreed that Mr. Freeze, Poison Ivy, Bane and Batgirl had to be in the movie, regardless how. So then, for no reason, they were just thrown in. There's no reason to it. No organic purpose for them to be in the movie. They're just...there.

All of Mr. Freeze's line seem to consist of bad one-liners involving the following words: ice, freeze, cold, chill, etc. And, I poop you not, he uttered the following line:

"Today Gotham, tomorrow...the WORLD!"

What else, lemme see...oh yeah! In the beginning, Mr. Freeze ices the museum and his hockey-playing henchmen are skating around beating up on the Bat and Bird. So what do B&R do? They click their heels, à la Wizard of Oz, and out pop skates. Skates in their boots! Does this happen often enough to necessitate skates being installed in their boots?

Other instances of awfulness are too frequent to mention in detail, so I'll give a brief summary:
-Surfing on metal doors
-Awful acting
-Alicia Silverstone
-Bane
-Motorcycle racing
-Those computers you only see in the movies with extremely easy to use interfaces
-That buffoon Commissioner Gordon (start doing your job and stop calling Batman for everything!)

All this in a movie written by the same guy who wrote A Beautiful Mind (actually I didn't see that movie but I'm told it's good). He also wrote Batman Forever. He also wrote A Time to Kill. But then again, he is responsible for Lost in Space and I, Robot, so maybe he's not all that.

In summary, I want the new Christian Bale Batman now!

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

You know you're a dirty ethnic when...

So the other day I was thinking about those ethnic types (Armenian, Greek, etc...) you run into now and then. Yes, I am ethnic but I'm talking about a certain type. The aimless type who think they know everything there is and are kings of the world. You can tell the type by the following 3 tests:

-Grow huge afro
-Learn to play guitar and discuss 1970s bands who played before you were even born
-Say "what" at the end of every sentence

Now that I think of it, lemme add a few more:

-Spend 4+ years in CEGEP
-Are a master foosball player
-Think "Scarface" is the best movie ever
-Enjoy pro wrestling to no end

If you qualify for more than 3 of these, I think there's a strong chance you're a flaming greasy ethnic type.

I kid, I kid...or do I?!?! Hahaha...

Monday, April 04, 2005

But there is no joy in Mudville

2005 baseball season has begun, leaving us behind. I can say it's going to be a sombre summer. A summer without the joys of turning on the radio on a hot, lazy summer's evening, listening to the sweet sounds of the games. The cracks of the bat, the roars of the crowd, the slap of a ball hitting the catcher's glove. A once faithful baseball city was slowly killed by various factors (least of which was lack of fans, no matter what the American media likes to say). All I know is that the end result will be a sportsless summer. Going to games was fun, you know? It was a few relaxing hours of game-watching and chit-chatting and now that's gone.

No more team to follow; in it's stead, there are only players with whom I have a now-distant attachment who I'll follow for my online fantasy league.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Fox News

I know Joe mentioned this report a while back but if you have 42 minutes, I strongly recommend watching this to completion.

A damned shame what's going on in the States. I guess I'm liberal.