Now, with the release of her second solo album, comes more fodder for my own special brand of vitriolic diatribes. Her new song, "Wind It Up", really bothers me. First, it starts with a horrible re-imagining of that yodeling song from the Sound of Music (Julie Andrews is spinning in her grave!...what? she's not? Well...I see). Then the lyrics read like a 5th rate ripoff of "My Humps", which was already a 3rd rate song, at best.
Sample (bold added by me for emphasis):
This is the key that makes us wind upCompared with this from "My Humps":
When the beat comes on, the girls all line up
And the boys all look, but no, they can't touch
But the girls want to know why boys like us so much
They like the way we dance, they like the way we work
They like that way that L.A.M.B. is going 'cross my shirt
They like the way my pants, it compliments my shape (She's crazy, right?)
They like the way we react everytime we dance
They say I'm really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standin' next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin' a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin' at my lump, lump.
You can look but you can't touch it
I'm sure you are all familiar with the inane lyrics of "My Humps", so I won't sample any more of it, but you get the idea. Why Gwen, why? Also, why is the state of music so horrible, especially radio in this here city? There's nothing you can tune to and just leave on. Of course, there is no recourse on the dial anyway, so switching stations is really just an instinct and not a panacea for our musical woes. Maybe satellite radio is the way to go.