Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Peggle: A real life Ktarian mind game

I thought I could resist the notorious infestation that is Peggle but I couldn't resist. It's like the Ktarian mind game that Etana Jol gives Riker in that episode of TNG. Everyone's addicted to it and is pressuring me to play. I resisted long enough, hoping to be the Wil Wheaton in this scenario but I ended up being the Ashley Judd...lasting long without playing but not until the very end.

If some of you are still unfamiliar with this game, it's essentially a videogame variation on pinball where you have to hit all the orange pegs on the board before you run out of balls. The balls themselves could have special powers, too. The appeal of the game is basically visual and auditory stimulation. The colours are so vibrant and flashy and the sounds are so...satisfying that it makes you come back for more.

When I close my eyes, all I see are orange and blue pegs and all I can hear is Beethoven's Ode to Joy rattling about my skull.

Now if only Data would show up with a palm beacon to disrupt the mind-controlling effects of the game.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Susan Boyle: My $0.02

This past week, this Susan Boyle woman has apparently captured the world's attention by singing well on a British talent show.

As if that's not pathetic in and of itself, the fact that this woman is absolutely hideous cannot be ignored. What's that, you say? Calling her hideous is terribly mean? Not so, I counter. At least I'm calling it as it is. Everyone else who buys into this phenomenon are the mean ones for being complicit in mocking this woman.

I pose the following question. Is she the best singer who's come across one of these talent programs? The answer is no. Have better singers than her become sensations like this? The answer again is no. So why is Susan Boyle so special?

Because she's hideous. That's a fact and anyone who says differently is lying to themselves.

The contrast between her appearance and her singing also exposes a ridiculous prejudice in people, that being only good looking people could have some talent. Heaven forbid that ugly folks could do something well.

All this to say, if you're buying into this hype, at its root, she's only anything because of her lack of appearance.

On top of everything, what makes it even worse is that this is obviously a calculated maneuver. As if she didn't have to go through many stages of screening before making it on tv. And there is Simon Cowell, feigning incredulity at this woman. Word is he's busy signing her to record deals and will put out CDs to make a few bucks off her back while the iron is hot.

Shameful.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Years of research

After years of consuming candy bars, I think I am eminently qualifies to render judgment on which one is the best. Yes, there is an ebb and flow to my tastes, depending on the day. Sometimes I love a Wunderbar, other times a Coffee Crisp will do the trick. But there's one bar that will always hit the spot.

Crispy Crunch.

There's something about the crispiness of that centre portion interacting with the outside chocolate shell that just so satisfying. And most of all, it tastes fantastic. Sure, the peanut flakes might get stuck in your molars but that's an added bonus, a time-release flavour delivery system, if you will.

What's your favourite bar?