Saturday, February 05, 2011

Double, double, toil and trouble-some bus passenger

Long have I railed against buses and all the ills they introduce into the world. Never mind the diseased poles and infectious people whose mere breath carries with it sicknesses untold. And worse still, the evil bus drivers who delight in speeding off even though they could have easily slowed down to pick you up. But I digress. I am not here to discuss the actual bus system today. Nay, I issue this missive against the 40-something Greek lady who takes the #33 in the mornings.

Since moving to my current location, my bus situation is great. I have two buses I can take straight downtown in around 25 minutes, and both are generally pretty empty so I'm always guaranteed a seat. The easier of the two buses to catch, the 33, always comes right on time at the stop a mere handful of meters from my building. But then...there's this woman...Surely a coven someplace is missing their High Priestess.

First, the pettiness. She has this giant, black, weeping willow of a hairstyle and she's often dressed in dark garb. I'm surprised she even takes the bus to work - her broom must be in the shop.

Anyway, this woman immediately proceeds to take out her Motorola RAZR from her purse and dial. (Hey lady, 2006 called to say that even in 2006, the RAZR was old news.) She calls someone and talks. And talks and talks and talks for the entire duration of the ride. Can somebody tell me who she's talking to at 8:30 in the morning, EVERY morning?! I keep thinking of the poor soul on the other side.
...Phone ringing...
Person on other side of phone: Oh dammit, Baba-Yaga is calling me again. It's so damned early! But if I don't answer, she'll just keep calling. Awww fine.... Hello? Yes, I understand, your mother sucks, your boss is an idiot, you're overworked, blah blah blah...
BUT (yes, there is a but to this story), since the new year, I've noticed a sadness that has crept into this woman. She no longer talks on the phone every morning for half an hour. Lately, she has either been reading, or just sitting quietly.

My theory?

The person on the other line made a new year's resolution to sleep more.